Fit Into My Puzzle Damnit!

My bestest friends ever. The ones I will always love so incredibly much, with every piece of my heart.

Nick: Nick asked me out about 15 times in 7th grade and I said no to him every single time. I wanted to say yes, but my other friends told me he wasn't "popular" enough. We became very close from the moment we met and by the earlier years of high school, we became best friends and he then told me he was gay. Around the same time he told me, he started dating my other best friend, Alex.

Alex: Alex was weird from the beginning. He was very odd but everyone talked to him because his extreme weirdness entertained them. I'm not kidding, the first thing he said to me EVER was while he was passing me in the hallway, "Your mom has a crusty vagina." Greaaat. He still has absolutely no filter. To the point where the last time I saw him he picked up a zucchini and compared it to the last guy he's slept with. Oh man. Sometimes I go "mommy Nicole" on him and tell him to calm it down. The day that I met him, when he was walking past me in the hallway, he was with my other best friend, Amanda.

Amanda: Amanda and I absolutely hated each other in elementary school. First of all, I had to stay in for recess in 3rd grade because she threw something at me, and then I threw something back but I was the only one that got caught. In 6th grade she told me that people were going to make fun of me in high school. By 7th grade we were best friends.

These three were my absolute and total and STILL best friends EVER. I love them with all of my heart and I miss living close to them. When I lived back home, we spent every single night together, no lie. I saw them more often than my parents. Now and then when they are all in my hometown at the same time, I drive up there and all three of us hang out. Alex and Nick have broken up over the last few months though, which has made it a little bit more difficult. Not too much though. And I love their new boys.

The other besties:

Athena: Athena and I were inseparable in 7th, 8th, and 9th grade. My mom was so annoyed because I'd never come home from school. I'd walk straight to Athena's house and make my mom drive 8 miles to come pick me up at night. Things got a little bit iffy when some bitch tried to ruin it. She tried to sabotage our friendship by telling Athena that I was a lesbian who had a crush on her. Shortly after, Athena told me, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you." After I explained to Athena what the bitch was doing, we fed her a poisoned muffin. I'm not kidding. It contained Dusty's medication (Athena's cat.). We also put a cat treat in it. Athena and I still keep in touch.

Melissa: Melissa was the biggest tomboy ever. We met in kindergarten and have been close friends since then. We used to alternate sleeping over at each other's houses every Saturday for as long as I can remember. We used to go camping together a lot too and we both loved Eminem. We saw Eminem in concert together, actually. Oh and guess what, her mom told her that she thought I was a lesbian. What the heck man. Am I that obvious?! Do I stare at women all of the time?! (The answer to that question is yes, definitely lol) Melissa's getting married very soon. I'm excited for her!

Lynn: Lynn is the weirdest, but most loving and silly individual that I have ever met in my life. I don't think she would kill a fly. I took her to her first concert in 7th grade, O-town. But then she got a boyfriend in 8th grade and I was jealous that she was spending more time with him. That, and she got her first kiss before me. Well, first guy kiss. I had my first girl kiss long before her so HA! By high school I got over it. We still hang out now and then.

Those were my absolute best friends, but I also had a lot of other really close friends, such as Liz, Nikole, Jen B., Jen L., Ashley, etc. High school was amazing for me. I don't feel like I spent one night at my own house. But this is what I'm really trying to say here.

I'm really fortunate. Extremely fortunate.

When I moved to Suburban Philly four years ago, I thought it was going to be easy. I made a large amount of friends extremely quick. However, quantity does not mean quality. I met a few keepers, but I struggle to become really close to any of them. There have been some close calls, like Judy, but no one has been a matching puzzle piece for me yet. Or, at least, no one has gotten to that point yet where I realize that they're a matching puzzle piece.

Kevin tells me to be patient: I'll make best friends that actually live less than 50 miles away from me. I'm being patient. But it's hard to be patient for 4 years straight.

That's why I need to remind myself how fortunate I am.