He Makes the Apartment Smell Gross

I'm really out of it today. I woke up, went to the fridge to get some lemonade, and then picked up my car keys and attempted to lock my refrigerator. Yeah. It's that bad. I blame the long hours that I've been working.

But my apparent insanity is not what I'm planning on discussing right now. There's something far more important.

So, I was minding my own business, making my grandmother's secret German dumpling soup. Everything was going fine and dandy, even though I spilled everything all over the place. (I'm a good cook, but the kitchen looks like a hurricane hit it after I'm done).

I was done cooking and just about to pour myself a bowl of the above-mentioned secret German dumpling soup... and then I heard it. The wiggling door knob. No, this wasn't a "Kevin's home" wiggle. This was a "Nicole hates her life" wiggle.

Our roommate is back. Our disgusting annoying roommate is back from Florida. There was no phone call, no warning whatsoever other than the signature wiggling noise the doorknob makes when he attempts to get his key into the hole and misses 60 million times.

He said about three sentences to me, walked around, went outside, came back in, walked around, and left. So maybe he's just visiting? It was a weird, quiet encounter. Am I allowed to bolt the door shut tonight?