BUT.. my friends know me. They know how important they are to me. They know that they are my life support and there is nothing that makes me happier than seeing their beautiful faces. And this friend that broke my heart knows it too.
His girlfriend told him that I can't be friends with him anymore. He informed me of this. My heart shattered into a million pieces and when I am diagnosed with a broken heart I get mean. So I was very very mean. And didn't mean a word of what I said because quite frankly, I love my friends with every single piece of my heart.
He knows that about me. And then in the midst of my being meanness, he wished me a happy birthday. And then...
He told me that his girlfriend is pregnant. And that he cares about me. And that he hopes one day that we can be friends again. But that he has got to be good to her right now.
And then everything made sense to me. And I guess I have to be patient. Because my friends are so important to me that I'm willing to be patient. I don't want to lose him or any of my friends, because they are the world to me. Actually... the universe to me. I have nothing else.
Today I'm 24. My heart is still aching and it's going to continue to ache until I get my best friend back. One thing that I think my friends need to know is how badly they can hurt me by leaving my side. I am devastated. And I'm on edge right now, worrying about the future. I need him just like I need all of my friends.
It's like a puzzle. If one piece goes missing, it never feels complete. I don't feel complete.
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