Ale-ale-jandro.

I had an intense conversation at the gay bar about how sexuality is fluid. It's interesting because my entire life, the one thing that has remained constant is that I'm incredibly attracted to women. Now and then, however, I go through about a week or so where I happen to notice men more, but not in an "I want to have sex with him" kind of way. More of a "Wow he's smoking hot" kind of way.

There's something in addition to my attraction to women that has remained constant. I have always been attracted to gay men. Like, incredibly. Like I am attracted to gay men nearly as much as I am attracted to women. It's funny. I get teased for it. I mean, it's definitely tease worthy. Here's a girl who identifies as a lesbian and yet she's attracted to seeing two men together. I mean, I don't want to touch them. I just want to observe.

It's fascinating.

Keely identifies as queer. And I understand why. Labels are so annoying. And yes, queer is a label, but it's a better label. "Lesbian" is so limiting. "Queer" definitely embraces sexual fluidity. For simplicity sake, I choose "lesbian" because I really just don't want to do anything sexual with men, period. I may be incredibly attracted to a man every once and a while (usually a gay man 99.9% of the time), but I really don't want his hands anywhere near me. Which is perfect because a gay man doesn't really want his hands anywhere near me either.

It's confusing, you know. I got a fortune cookie once that said “Truth is what stands the test of experience.” And as I said, the one thing that has stayed with me throughout my entire life was my attraction to women. (And gay men, haha).

Kind of funny because Gaga once said that the song Alejandro was inspired by her extreme attraction towards gay men, and how she always falls in love with gay men. I can relate Miss Stefani, I can relate.

Anyway, enough real talk. Last night was fun. Went to a gay bar with two of my favorite gay boys. Danced with pretty ladies, met some awesome people. The fucking bartender went to my high school! I have the craziest luck ever. The world is so big and yet I always always stumble across people that I know. Maybe I should play the lottery.